--come what may, came. Part III

I decide to try Alison’s “woman” doctor for my well check.  She wasn’t taking new patients but because Alison referred me, they said I could see her.  I waited three months for an appointment.  She was thorough; I’ll say that for her.  I’m not used to this.  You have to tell Dr. ____ at the _____ Clinic what is wrong with you and what you want him to prescribe.  (That’s why Amy likes him.)

She made a big deal out of everything.

“You need to lose 25 pounds.  Exercise. . .”

“Don’t even mention exercise.  Let's just say 'I do'.”

“Eye exam.”

“Ron is free.  I’ll see him.”

“You need to see a dermatologist for spots on your face.”

“Can’t you burn them?”

“Not these.  They’re too deep.”

“High blood pressure.  Better get you on some medication.”

“Cholesterol 314.  Low on Vitamin D."  

Bone Scan.  “You have osteoporosis.  Come right in to discuss.”

Then she got the thyroid ultra sound results.

Imaging for JEANETTE E HUGH

Top of Form

Location   Bountiful Clinic

Date       01/10/2012

Examination: Thyroid ultrasound
Clinical History: Hashimoto's

Findings: The right thyroid lobe measures approximately 4.3 x 2.5
x 2.6 cm. The thyroid tissue is markedly heterogeneous. The
isthmus is enlarged. A nodule within the isthmus measures 1.4 x
1.1 x 1.8 cm. No discrete nodule is identified within the right
thyroid lobe.
The left thyroid lobe measures at least 5.0 x 3.0 x 3.0 cm.
Occupying much of the left thyroid lobe is a slightly
heterogeneous solid nodule measuring 2.2 x 2.7 x 2.5 cm. Within
this nodule there is a bulky focus of shadowing calcification.
Impression:
1. Heterogeneous thyroid gland with a dominant nodule within the
left thyroid lobe containing a bulky focus of calcification.
Signed By: Smythe, Jason J., MD

 Bottom of Form

In plain English, I have two nodules.  One in the center and one big one practically filling the left side. 

She schedules me to see the surgeon the first day he is in the clinic, which is next Tuesday.  They also need to check the lymph glands.

Suddenly we would just wait and watch the spots on my face.  No mention of the eye test.  Osteoporosis, spine and hip: "Maybe the Vitamin D will help.  Do you want to just watch it for a year?”

I was prepared for battle.  I thought she would insist I take all these drugs.  Well, she did talk me into going back on lipitor and a very low dosage for high blood pressure plus the prescription Vitamin D. All the other problems she had been worrying me about were brushed aside.

It’s a psychological battle.  The anxiety and worry are almost unbearable.  Everything hurts; I can’t swallow; my shoulders and neck ache; my throat is dry; I cough and sneeze and constantly blow my nose; am I getting Staph infection?  Oh my hurting knees; I’m light-headed; dizzy; tired; weak; this pounding in my ear is driving me crazy; no one cares; I’ve had more than my share; who will care for Ed?

Did I do damage massaging on the roller?  doing incessant chin locks to stimulate my thyroid?  gravity inversion table?  vibrator?

Bad news is debilitating to mental health and emotional well-being.

Slow down.  Take a deep breath.  How do you really feel?  Is it any different than before you found out?  Didn’t you feel strong then, like you could and would conquer physical afflictions?

Physically I probably don’t feel any different than I did before I found out about those nodules in my thyroid gland but mentally and emotionally I’m devastated.

OK – on my honor I promise to do my best to be well until proven sick.